A few days ago I happened to think of hoverboards, so I thought I could draw some.

I can’t deny I’ve always had a thing for hoverboards.
Well, I’m sure I’m not the only one.
Let’s say I’m just one of those who have a thing for hoverboards.
They are one of those unkept promises that people from the 80s still begrudge, together with jetpacks and flying cars.

I check daily on Amazon for availability, with no success.
This is the only one I found, which doesn’t really hover, it’s way too pink and disturbingly too 80s.
Plus, the auction starts at 30000 USD.
Oh well.

Not that I’m complaining about the technology available today, of course.
I mean, my grandma used to fetch water from the river with a vase balancing on her head so, well, tap water technology is already pretty cool if you asked her.
Also, I draw things on a screen. And when I touch the screen, things happen. Ok, sometimes they don’t happen at all and I have to download and reinstall the drivers of the bloody screen, but it’s still pretty cool, and nowhere near as upsetting as not having a hoverboard.

How difficult can it be to make one? We have laser guns! They were in everybody’s list of things they expected to see in the future, and here they are. Why not hoverboards?

We should set our priorities straight, people. Lasers are cool, there’s no denying it. But they really look at their best when shot at alien invaders from a real spaceship, so the timing is all wrong here.

So, in case scientists ever happen to read this and were undecided what to focus on next, here’s where I would put our R&D money for the next few years:

– fucking Hoverboards, let’s get them out of the way guys.
– flying cars (you can hoverboard to the office for your work commute, but you do need a flying car if you have kids).
– decent robots (ok we’re getting there)
– warp drive spaceships (just a few years for those)
– ONLY THEN, laser guns

Should THE GOVERNMENT agree with my list, here’s some quick designs. Just in case.

 

 

by Paolo Puggioni